It’s a good apron, no doubt, but there are a lot of ideas butting heads on it. Acquiring it was probably a case of seeing it in a shop or online and thinking it was nice, but it might have been a more exhaustive process of trying to find exactly what he wanted.
“Hi, Danny Worsnop here. Have you got an apron mainly based around pineapples, but with gingham detailing on the strap and pockets?”
“We certainly do!”
“Does it have some sort of nautical emergency message spray-painted on the front?”
“YOU BET YOUR ASS IT DOES!”
How many shops turned him away with a pineapple apron with gingham straps that didn’t quite have what he wanted sprayed on the front? Imagine Danny looking forlornly at a pineapple apron with gingham straps with “OK!” sprayed on the front, or one with S.O.S. on it like he wanted, but where the design was based around watermelons instead. Bleak.